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“Giant Blue”

I’ve never felt so horrible in my entire life.

She yells at me, my mother’s voice picking out my every flaw, but her words are lost on me; I’m too busy trying to block out my baby sister’s screams. The noise is deafening, my knees are shaking... if I stay here any longer, I’ll be sure to burst. That single, feather-light thought is all it takes. Before I can even register what’s happening, my feet are carrying me across rain-soaked ground. No more noise; nothing but the rich scent of wet soil and the distant echo of crashing waves.

Like a father’s hand, the ocean’s appeal draws me near, and I’m soon standing on a grassy hill over-looking Giant Blue.

She makes me think. Perhaps it was wrong of me to do what I did. Earlier that day, I had stuck a wad of princess-pink bubble gum in my sister’s hair, pay back for her stealing my cookie the night before. She totally deserved it! But of course, Mother yells at me. It’s all my fault. I’m the older brother, I should know better. She should have punished the true criminal before I had to!

I was sick of the noise, sick of the blame, sick of my family. I realize now, that’s why I left. Giant Blue’s bone-chilling waters swirl below me. On the horizon, I see the remains of the morning’s storm. Even though lightning flashes and rain falls, Giant Blue’s waves are gentle. She reminds me of my mother.

Suddenly, I’m filled with gut-wrenching regret. My stomach knots and I begin to sob, dropping to my knees. Guilt. Remorse. That’s what I feel.

A gentle hand meets my shoulder and I look behind me. Through my tears, I recognize the tea leaf-green apron of my mother’s. She meet’s my desperate hug with loving arms. Lifting me up off of the muddy ground, she whispers honey-sweet, silky-soft comforts into my ear. As we turn and walk, I see Giant Blue in my blurry gaze and I know that I’m exactly where I’m meant to be.

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